The Sound of Drowning
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The Sound of Drowning
I’d promised Ben I’d come, and I’d broken that promise.
“So what happened?” Tension creased his forehead. “I waited here for hours.”
Guilt churned in my belly. What was wrong with me? I’d been off having fun while Ben waited and worried. “I’m so sorry. You must hate me.”
“Don’t say that.” Ben reached for my hand, but I pulled it back. “Just tell me what happened.”
I walked to the top of the dune and sat down in a bare patch between the grass. It wasn’t our normal spot. Tonight, I didn’t feel worthy of it.
Ben followed, stopping a few feet away and facing the ocean, now mostly obscured by nightfall. “Did you forget?” His question was a whisper in the dark. “About me?”
“Yes…I mean, no.” I sucked in a ragged breath. “It wasn’t like that.” I looked up at him. “I could never forget about you.”
He stood with his feet apart, his arms folded across his chest. When he stood like that, he looked like his dad. “So what was it like?”
I couldn’t lie to Ben. Not again. Even if the truth ruined everything we had, I wouldn’t lie again. “I went to the mainland… with Wyatt.”
“Wyatt?”
“The new kid in school from Texas. He’s a motocross racer, or he used to be, and he asked me if I wanted to go riding with him.”
Ben shifted his weight, staring down at me. “And you said yes.”
I nodded.
For a moment, neither of us spoke.
Ben’s jaw worked back and forth. He was taking in my words, processing them. “Why?”
I sprang to my feet, leaving my backpack abandoned in the sand. “Because he asked me, and I wanted to do something exciting. Sometimes I feel trapped on these islands.”
“Do you mean trapped here with me?”
“No.” God, how could I explain this? “I wanted to take a risk and not worry about the consequences.”
“Did you like it?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and remembered the feeling of hurtling around the track. “I loved it.”
“Do you like him?”
My eyes flew open. Ben looked scared. “I love you.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“Yeah.” I blinked. “I like him as a friend. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t know anything about…the past. He doesn’t judge me.” What was I saying? Why was I bringing this up now?
Ben pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “And I do?”
I wanted them to stop, but my words kept coming. “Maybe. You say you don’t, but how do I really know? You’d have every right to. I messed everything up. I lied to you.” I kicked at the sand, tired from the weight of my bottled-up feelings. “And when I’m with you, I’m constantly reminded of that. Every time I look at you, I remember what I did.”
“I guess I finally know how you feel.” Ben looked like I’d punched him in the gut. And I was the one responsible for hurting him. What was wrong with me? Why did I keep doing this to the first and last boy I would ever love? Sometimes I found it hard to remember how perfect it had been.
Meredith Hall is living a secret life. Every night, when her parents think she is at work, she’s actually taking the ferry to go visit her best friend and boyfriend, Ben. Ben is Mer’s first love and the person she wants to spend her life with. Mer has her reasons for the relationship having to remain a secret. The relationship ended once before, with the fallout rippling beyond just the two of them. This time, Mer is determined to avoid making the same mistakes. She feels that without Ben, she would be missing a part of herself and a key piece necessary to obtain true happiness in her life.
A wrench is thrown into Mer’s perfect life plan when Wyatt washes ashore on the island, literally. Mer and Wyatt meet when she rescues him from rocky kayaking conditions, saving his life. Wyatt’s outgoing, bold personality initially sets him off on the wrong foot with Mer, but as they run into each other time and time again, his Texas charm and upbeat personality begin to grow on her. Wyatt brings out the adventurous side of Mer, making her feel happiness and excitement for life that she hasn’t felt for quite some time. As time passes, Mer and Wyatt begin to share their deepest secrets, causing them to grow closer and closer.
As Mer tries to keep both her relationship with Ben secret and her friendship with Wyatt strictly platonic, she feels herself increasingly being pulled in two different directions. She soon recognizes that she cannot maintain both the relationship and friendship simultaneously. As her relationships intensify, Mer realizes that she must confront her true feelings and find the courage to follow her heart.
The Sound of Drowning is author Katherine Fleet’s second contemporary young adult novel for Page Street Publishing. Fleet has recently moved back to her home city of St. John’s, Newfoundland, after a decade of living in the Caribbean with her husband, a pilot, and three children. She is fond of and has written several novels during National Novel Writing Month. This book takes place on the islands of the Outer Banks, North Carolina. Fleet has created beautiful imagery to bring the setting to life. The setting of the book is particularly relevant to the plot of the text, making it crucial for the author of such a text to do justice to its description. Fleet has exceeded expectations of a well-detailed plot—the description of the islands, ocean, beaches, and weather patterns were woven into the text and are likely to create pictures in readers’ minds. As readers experience the high points in the plot, they will be able to visualize exactly how they are occurring and how the events are influenced by the setting.
The Sound of Drowning takes many twists and turns and will leave readers guessing right until the climax where the true reasons for Ben and Mer’s relationship having to remain a secret are revealed. The book forms an intriguing and unique combination of suspense and romance, striking the perfect balance of the two. Although one may read the description on the back of the book and believe that it may be a predictable coming-of-age story of a teen love triangle, the reality is that this text delves into some heavy topics that are relevant to teens, such as gaining independence, transition from teen years to adulthood, making tough decisions, mental health, and resilience, among others.
Fleet has created characters that are realistic and relatable, facing challenging circumstances and obstacles that affect real-life teens. The author has skillfully developed these characters by showing, not telling the reader who they are. With the story being told through alternating passages of present-day events and flashbacks, readers will gain an understanding of Mer’s character and discover the backstory of her relationship with Ben and why it must remain a secret as the plot unravels.
The Sound of Drowning is a masterfully crafted tale of identity filled with concepts relevant to teens that extend far beyond surface level. This book would be a valuable and relevant read for young people in the target audience in order to explore and extend understanding of relationships, family, identity and self-discovery, making tough decisions, mental health, and resilience in the face of obstacles. I believe that this book would be a well-loved addition to any classroom, school, or home library.
Chasity Findlay is a graduate of the Master of Education program in Language and Literacy at the University of Manitoba and an avid reader of young adult fiction.