My Best Friend

Do children understand the danger of serious illnesses? They do, and it’s difficult for most adults, and especially parents, to talk with them about the possibility of dying. Children fear the unknown, the prospect of being separated from their families; parents want to give their children hope of a long and active future, and so the topic is sometimes discussed obliquely or avoided altogether.

But when one is sickest, one wants relief from pain and the treatments that make one sicker. So it is with Gilles Tibo’s young protagonist in My Best Friend, an illustrated early chapter book originally published in French (Ma meilleure ami, les Éditions Québec Amérique, 2007), which won the Governor General’s Literary Award for Children’s Literature (Illustration) for artist Janice Nadeau. Tibo has authored and illustrated some 250 books for children since 1975 and has won the Governor General’s Literary Award twice, as well as many more honours internationally. My Best Friend is a tender story that reflects children’s imaginative meanderings and their perceptions about dying.

The child (a boy? a girl?) is seriously ill and wishes for Death:

In the beginning of my hospitalization, when I was very sick, I called Death often to come look for me. I listened for her. When she was approaching, I whispered to her, “Hey, Death … I’m here … Take me with you, if you would like …”

Tibo anthropomorphizes Death, giving her a personality that is not malevolent, but sensitive and reflective. She is surprised when the child invites her to sit on the bed and take a sip of water. Soon, the two are best buddies - Death even slips under the covers to sleep with her friend, and, in time, Death begins to open up about her concerns. She admits she feels sad about her only purpose - to take people away from life. No one wants her around, of course.

The child thinks he is doing his friend a favour in listening to her, not comprehending that, when Death is near, death is nigh. As they talk, the child comes to understand Death’s unchanging but essential mission: she makes room for new life.

I understand all this but I ask Death to wait before taking me away. It’s not for me. I think about my parents. They are not ready. They will not survive my departure.

The narrative includes a bit of childlike humour because, even in grim situations, children like to laugh. Tibo gives readers a happy ending, as many endings for children are these days, thanks to advances in treatments for serious childhood diseases such as cancer. Death seems to already know her friend will survive and cries tears of joy. “We embrace each other and we stay still all night.”

Three-time GG award-winner Janice Nadeau’s soft, shadowy watercolours on white pages capture the austere look and the stillness of the hospital room, the grief that surrounds illness, the unending space in a child’s mind. She shows Death curled over herself, burdened by her task, an unhappy wraith that slips in and out unseen.

Colour in the form of a yellow bird returns to the child’s life when his parents arrive to pack his bags and take him home, to hopefully live a long, joyous life. “I don’t want to brag but I want to live Life treasuring every moment!”

My Best Friend is a valuable book that should be available in a school or classroom library because children do think about death and may need a vehicle to begin talking about it. The book could be used to bring children and adults closer when they or someone in their family is faced with a life-threatening illness - with hope for a positive outcome, yet accepting the possibility of death with grace.

Children aged 12-14 can explore ideas about death through The Book Thief (2005) by Markus Zuzak and Keturah and Lord Death (2006) by Martine Leavitt, but children who are younger need a story at their level of reading and comprehension to ease their fears. My Best Friend fills that need, perfectly.